Are you looking for that “missing piece” that has eluded you during years of meditating, healing and transformational work?
Do you long for a deep, unconditional self-love that allows you to free yourself from cycles of negativity, judgment, fear and shame – and open to a more connected, compassionate and creative relationship with yourself and others?
If so, you have come to the right place…
Those of us who have been on the transformational path have often spent many years meditating, doing therapy and participating in growth workshops. We’ve created powerful life intentions and worked on releasing our childhood stories. We’ve journaled our traumas. We’ve replaced limiting beliefs with more empowering ones.
And yet, if you are like most of us, there hasn’t been a deep shift in the baseline of loving yourself, which is central to your happiness. There may remain a subtle level of judgment and frustration with where you are – a sense of us not quite being good enough. Deep down, you may feel unlovable. Inadequate. Ashamed of parts of yourself. Or feel you need to improve in some way before you can be happy. You may even hate aspects of yourself.
Inner bonding really nurtures and fosters the relationship between self and spirit. Personally, it has helped every relationship that I have. I’m so grateful to Margaret for bringing inner bonding to people in the generous, nurturing way that she has. – Alanis Morissette, Singer-Songwriter
When you are in this state, you not only feel badly about yourself, it undermines your relationships: You show up looking to GET love from people, rather than SHARE love, which introduces a bunch of problems.
All of these challenges can be traced back to the parts of you that haven’t fully healed and create the inner wholeness that you know is possible.
Many of these challenges are part and parcel of the human condition. Very few of us got a really healthy template for love growing up. And in our youthful “omnipotence,” we may have assumed WE were to blame – creating a core sense of shame or inadequacy.
Instead of addressing this at the root, we often create other substitute ways to experience that sense of unconditional love or avoid its painful absence – attachments to alcohol or drugs, addictions to relationships or sex, bouts with unhealthy eating patterns, even a tendency to numb out with media and technology.
Anything, it seems, to fill that ache inside, to have us “feel good” about ourselves.
Then, when we hear spiritual teachers sing the praises of unconditional love, we can feel depressed because we are aware of the swirl of self-judging thoughts, muddied emotions and the drama that manifests in our relationships – which can feel anything but loving.
Truly Loving Yourself from the Inside
Finding a steady stream of unconditional love from the INSIDE can, thus, seem like an impossible goal. Even if you are a dedicated seeker, you can find yourself struggling with a sense of incompleteness – of not having found the wholeness you are searching for.
That’s because there is an aspect of your growth and healing that is rarely – if ever – addressed by current approaches. And that is the ability for you to truly love different parts of yourself, and to create a secure inner bond between them.
The lack of this deep inner bonding is at the core of a remarkable number of challenges you might face – ranging from relationship struggles to addiction, anxiety and depression.
Underneath, there is almost always a place where you are rejecting or abandoning yourself…without even realizing it.
A Proven Process for Healing
It’s time for a new approach – one that blends spiritual practices with psychological science. And that approach is Inner Bonding, co-founded by psychologist Dr. Margaret Paul.
Inner Bonding begins with compassionate, deep inquiry to access and heal these parts of yourself and create a new template inside – one based on your higher Self, rather than your parental role models.
It helps you feel, embrace and embody the totality of your self, so that you are releasing your control games and addictive patterns, and discovering how to take action that reflects real self-love.
Before inventing the Inner Bonding methodology, Dr. Margaret had reached a point in her private practice where she was frustrated by the lack of real progress being made by clients. Then, when she met the method’s co-creator, they received higher guidance about how to develop the system.
Since the creation of Inner Bonding, Dr. Margaret has been blown away with the results in her practice, and in her own life. The core practices are remarkably effective with virtually anyone, and have positively impacted tens of thousands worldwide – including people like Grammy-winning artist Alanis Morissette – who has become a powerful public champion of the work
In the years since its inception, Inner Bonding has gained in stature and importance as a potent method for creating theinternal self-love that is the hallmark of psychological and spiritual health (and which results in far more satisfying relationships).
During the Power to Heal Yourself course, you’ll learn the most important core insights and practices of this groundbreaking approach, which you can apply to cultivating truly unconditional self-love and self-worth – the foundation needed to go beyond addictions, dramas and dysfunctions of all kinds.
The Power of Inner Bonds
One way of understanding the Inner Bonding approach is to think about how psychology has shown that different levels of secure attachment are essential for a developing child. When we don’t have the attachments we need, that leaves parts of us feeling left out and rejected – parts of our personality and self that were not seen, embraced or loved by our parental figures.
Virtually all of us reach adulthood with aspects of ourselves feeling left out or rejected.
Instead of seeing this as a hopeless scenario, Inner Bonding uses a specific and proven 6-step methodology to establish clear, loving connections between these different aspects of your consciousness and also to your higher Self.
You will be taken through these 6-steps in a precise way during The Power to Heal Yourself – giving you not only an experience of unconditional love in the present, but also the means to keep working with different aspects of yourself into the future.
You’ll learn how to dialogue with your feelings, pain, anxiety, self-hatred and fear, as well as get to the core of self-abandonment and shame. You’ll see how you can start connecting to higher guidance around your beliefs, and take loving actions that reinforce positive shifts.
And you’ll even learn how to establish new brain pathways for truly loving yourself.
Be Guided Step by Step
The first step in the Inner Bonding approach is understanding how to be present in your body through mindfulness practice. Most people are in their head, and avoid their feelings by judging themselves. And because they’re abandoning themselves, they feel more alone and empty- creating more pain. You’ll discover how to truly be in your body, and be fully present to your feelings.
The second step is based on being grounded in the intention, “I will learn how to love myself.” During this phase of the journey, you’ll discover how to love yourself in a way that frees you from controlling behaviors and unconscious reactions to pain. This will help you move into your healthy adult self.
The third step is a dialogue process with your feelings, pain, anxiety, fear, shame. You’ll begin to see all feelings as giving you important information, instead of something to avoid. You’ll understand the root of why you avoid certain overwhelming feelings and what you’re doing now to perpetuate wounded feelings – as well as release outdated beliefs.
In the fourth step, you’ll learn to open to your higher source of guidance, focusing on learning how to love yourself and what loving actions to take toward yourself. This will help you raise the frequency of your consciousness – amplifying access to your higher purpose, creativity and joy.
In the fifth step, you’ll take loving actions to reinforce the higher frequency. And in the sixth, to complete the process, you’ll learn to carefully evaluate your feelings.
This whole sequence does not happen just once, but can be applied many times throughout your day – during meditation, a break at work, or even while you are sitting at a traffic light.
It gives you an easy-to-use roadmap for working with issues, fears, anxieties and challenges that arise – bringing them into a state of loving wholeness.
When you take The Power to Heal Yourself course, you will:
- Learn how to share love, rather than get love
- Gain relief from pain, anger and shame
- End many unhealthy patterns in relationship
- Get to the root of what is causing depression and anxiety
- Discover how to use self-love – instead of food – to fill emptiness
- Approach new relationships from a stance of fullness, instead of neediness
- Release and heal outdated beliefs about yourself
- Move out of stagnation into a life of aliveness, passion and sense of purpose
- Diminish and understand your addictive patterns
- Gain deeper insights into, and freedom from, repeating patterns you don’t want – relationship fights, addictions and/or attracting the same type of people
- Enhance your ability to resolve conflicts and communicate
- Receive clarity about how you’ve been depleting yourself through strategies to get love from others
- Renew your sense of purpose for being alive
- Deepen your spiritual practices by freeing up some of your past so you can rise to higher frequencies more regularly in your other practices
- Move beyond feelings of victimhood, powerlessness and hopelessness
- Learn to love others in a self-responsible and adult way
What You’ll Learn in These 7 Modules
In this 7-part intensive, Dr. Margaret will teach you how to transform your life through a self-healing process that creates a shift into true self-love and establishes a daily personal connection and dialogue with a loving source of higher guidance.
Each teaching, inquiry and practice session will build harmoniously upon the next, so that you’ll develop a complete understanding of the practices, tools and principles you’ll need to love yourself and share your love with others.
Module One: Beginning Your Inner Journey
In this first session, we will explore how at the deepest level only two paths in life are available to us: “the path of fear” and “the path of courage and love.” Underlying the choice between these two paths is the moment-by-moment choice of one of two intentions. You will explore four different aspects of yourself that need to be understood and eventually integrated. Subjects include:
- Understanding the intent to learn about loving yourself, and the intent to avoid pain through some form of controlling behavior
- Understanding the various forms of controlling behavior that stem from self-rejection/self-abandonment
- Integrating your essence, your ego-wounded self, your loving adult and your higher Self on another level
- Defining the 6 steps of Inner Bonding
- Becoming aware of the consequences of each intention
Module Two: Getting to Know and Compassionately Accept Your Wounded Self
In this session, we will go deeply into your survival mechanism – the part of you that got you through difficult times as you were growing up. You will become aware of the role modeling that creates this aspect of yourself – the aspect that now needs to heal and transform into a creative ally. Subjects include:
- Understanding the false beliefs of your wounded self
- Becoming aware of where you got your false beliefs and your controlling, addictive behaviors
- Discovering the ways you protect against pain that actually creates more pain
- Seeing how we develop into takers and caretakers – two sides of the wounded self
- Understanding Shame
Module Three: Connecting with Your Higher Guidance and Discovering Your True Core Self
In this module you will discover the beauty of who you really are, and how to develop your loving adult self who can take loving action on your own behalf – and on behalf of others. Through visualization, you will learn to connect with your personal source of spiritual guidance that will then become the role model for loving yourself, and enables you to see who you really are. Subjects include:
- Discovering how to define your true, core self
- Learning to connect with your loving source of spiritual guidance
- Understanding the difference between operating from your wounded self and from your loving adult self
- Accessing your role-model for loving action
Module Four: Becoming Fully Connected to Yourself in This Moment
Step 1 of Inner Bonding
You will receive a mindfulness process for connecting with your physical and emotional feelings, discovering how to move from your head into your body. You will learn how to be fully present in this moment, and find the place within you that wants to evolve from your feelings rather than avoid them. Subjects include:
- Discovering what it means to be “willing,” and the false beliefs in the way of your willingness to feel your feelings and learn from them
- Identifying the wounded feelings that we create and how to open to them
- Understanding the core painful feelings of life that come from others and situations
- Exploring false beliefs about pain, and the difference between pain and suffering
Module Five: Intent and the Loving Adult
Step 2 of Inner Bonding
In this session we go deeply into the intent to learn, rather than the intent to control. We will explore various means of opening to learning and what to do if anger, blame and resentment are in the way of opening your heart to learning and becoming a loving adult. Subjects include:
- Deep inquiry into the powerful intent to learn about love
- Understanding how raise your frequency to connect with your spiritual guidance
- Understanding and applying the “power of compassion”
- Connecting with guidance to become a loving adult
- Going through the “Inner Bonding Anger Process”
Module Six: Your Feelings, False Beliefs and Accessing the Truth
Steps 3 and 4 of Inner Bonding
You will learn dialogue processes with your core self, your wounded self and your spiritual guidance. This is a deep internal dialogue process with your feelings and your belief system – enabling you to uncover false beliefs that may be causing your pain. Subjects include:
- The layers of exploration that enables you to access your unconscious beliefs
- The key questions to ask your core self and your wounded self
- The key questions to ask your spiritual guidance to heal your false beliefs and resulting pain
Module Seven: The Power of Loving Action and Evaluating the Action
Steps 5 and 6 of Inner Bonding
In this module we will explore the various kinds of loving actions – actions for yourself alone, and actions in relationships with others. Taking loving action can tap into deep fears, and these will be explored in precise depth. Then, you will learn how to evaluate whether or not the action you took was loving to you. Subjects include:
- How to really know what exactly are loving actions
- Taking the loving actions that help redefine your own worth
- Loving actions in relationships, and in conflict with others
- Understanding the two healthy choices in conflict
- The results of loving action: relief from guilt, anger, shame, anxiety, and depression – feeling whole, expansive and spacious
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